Texting and community-A New Generation of Pew Sitters

The room was dark except for whatever emanated from the stage lights. It seemed smoky but it wasn’t. About 50 young people had gathered for the indie rock show our church sponsors, as we do many weekends. There’s no real stage, only a ‘stage area’, distinguishable by a carpet that elevates the performers a good half-inch above their audience. Most of the audience was standing in front of the ‘stage,’ gathered in a semi-circle. The first ‘row’ was an arms length from the lead singer. And a half-inch below. Some in the audience swayed to and fro, moved by the music. Most just stood casually by, a stance that somehow seemed to communicate as much of a positive response to the music as the swaying. And then there was a third group. Along the walls of the room there are two old church pews that represent both a nod to and a departure from the generations of the faithful that had come before us. This night the pew closest to me was filled with young bottoms. About 5 or 6 young men and women in their teens or early twenties. Each held a cell phone whose light shown dimly on their faces. They were, well, texting. There they were, sitting together, communicating, but not with each other. (Unless, of course they were texting each other, which is a possibility, considering the decibel level in the room.) The generation illustrated by these 5-6 youthful butts in a pew is not the future church. They ARE the church. And those of us who are older and whose thumbs lack the agility to text must take note. We must listen to them and understand. We must not write them off because their world is different than ours…because they are different. We are quick shake our heads and say that they are not experiencing ‘real community’ because they are not truly present in the here and now. If they cannot give their full attention to the one sitting next to them, they’re missing an opportunity for relationship. If they are more attuned to the one they are texting than the one they’re with, then something is wrong. And if we said that we would have a valid point. But before we do, lets look a bit closer. First of all, they chose physical proximity. The pew-sitters didn’t isolate themselves in order to begin texting. They found other butts to sit with. Other texting butts, but butts nonetheless. They could have instead found a corner where they could have been ‘alone’ with their texting buddy, but they didn’t. They didn’t consider it rude or antisocial for their fellow pew-mates to be communicating with who-knows-who. They didn’t find that it cheapened the moment or the relationship with those in present company. They were together, sharing the same space, breathing the same air. They were enjoying a social and perhaps a spiritual event in the same time and space, and thus they were together in a real way. Is it not sometimes enough to just sit together in the presence of your friend, your lover, your Lord? Is silence among us always a sign of disconnect? No, it is being uncomfortable with the silence that more assuredly indicates a lack of connection. And perhaps the moment was important enough to them that they felt the need to expand the circle beyond who was actually physically present. Perhaps the reason for their behavior was different than we imagine…perhaps they texted not because being present was lacking or because they were bored. Maybe it was because they could not tolerate keeping the moment all to themselves. Maybe the circle of fellowship was larger because those sitting on the pews held their phones before them, thumbs moving at lightning speed, faces aglow. Or maybe they were texting about donuts, hated the band and could barely tolerate being in the same room with the others. Thoughts?